I'm loving angels instead...

Rawr stupid. Irritated at myself. Spoil all the pics. And the last one with the five of us, i wasn't prepared. Stupid.

Feel left out at times. But what can I say? It ain't fine but I guess I'm used to it.

Just like how we're used to getting all the blame. Can't even say a word at home. Just one word and you get scolded. Haha seems I have more experience than you in this manner. Lucky girl. Indeed, I'm always the one arrowed. Because I'm the oldest child. Because I'm a girl. So what? The other person has two hands, two feet, a brain and a heart too. Why does it matter so much?

(Wait I take it back. Maybe more occasions of being displaced. But you held on longer, stronger. Built more and thicker walls. Before bursting.)

So many holes in the target board. Like the guy who walked right through a battlefield and came out bloody with strips of skin and flesh just hanging on to the rest of him, flapping in the wind. Yet still walking.

After a while, you tell yourself that you don't care. But at the very depths, you care so much. You ache for it.

Was I born to give away and not receive anything but the things I scrape together in my own mind?